My 20 Year Journey

On October 20th, I received some of the best news of my life.  My last project paper for school passed.  What started out as a journey in 1994 is finally over.   I am now officially a college graduate.  Words can't even express how I feel right now.   Not gonna lie, I went home from work that day and was dancing around my house like Rerun on "What's Happening".

 There was a point where I only had 4 classes left and I honestly wanted to quit.  Luckily I knew this was foolish and I persevered.    Then I had two classes left.   I had a technical writing class which meant I needed to write a project proposal paper about 20-25 pages in length.   My paradox is I'm actually good at writing, but I hate doing it.   It was at this point where I felt like I would never finish, but with my wife cheering me on I finished that paper in less than 7 days.   Last class left was to write another paper on the completion of the project, also 20-25 pages.    I spent 10 hours straight on Sunday writing that paper and I submitted it for grading.

I could hardly concentrate at work the next day, as I kept checking Taskstream to see where my paper was at in the queue.   I started off as number 9 that Sunday night, and I was still number 9 in the queue when I got to work Monday morning.  Then a few hours later I was number 6.   About two hours before the end of work I saw my paper was being reviewed.   I don't know if I've ever been more anxious in my entire life.   At this point there was no point in even trying to concentrate on work anymore as I kept anxiously hitting the refresh button every 15 minutes.

When I saw that the paper had passed, I threw my hands in the air like Rocky.  My co-workers looked at me like I was crazy but I didn't care.   I was so happy I didn't know what to do with myself.  I immediately sent a text to my wife and my siblings.  It still hasn't TRULY set in yet that I'm finally done with my Bachelors.  And anyone who tells you that all online degrees are easy, obviously never attended Western Governors University because that school is NOT easy.  You will definitely EARN your degree.

Graduation will be in Orlando at Disney, so my wife and I plan to make a mini-vacation out of the weekend.  For those of you out there thinking about going back to school or trying to finish up, you can do it!   What worked for me is I would visualize myself sitting in the crowd listening to the graduation ceremony.   I also envisioned myself walking across the stage to get my diploma.    

Back on the Swingset

So the wife and I created our AFF (adultfriendfinder) profile this week.   Surprisingly (well, not really) the majority of the people on there are the same people who were on there two years ago.

Obviously, the single guys are still dumb and illiterate.  Even though it clearly states "No Single Guys" on our profile, the majority of the flirts and messages we get are from guys.  It's no wonder single guys get such a bad rep on swinger sites.    We've also recently discussed wanting to meet more couples, and we're open to the idea of doing a soft swap with the right couple.    Most of the single females I see on there are the same flakes from before.    I don't really think we'll end up meeting a female on the website, but I guess it's worth a shot.

I'm thinking we'll probably end up going to the swinger clubs again to find a female, but hopefully we can meet some cool couples as well.   We just have to be very careful this time to not let it mess up our marriage.
  

Unicorn Strategy: The Hunt For Pink

My wife and I went for a walk yesterday.    She surprised and said she'd been thinking about how we're going to find our single female.    She said she was thinking we should create another profile on adultfriendfinder to find someone.   Create the profile just long enough for us to find someone, have the threesome, then delete the profile.   She also said we can start going to some meet and greets, and she's also open to the idea of it being someone we already know, and she specifically mentioned the female that contacted me last week.

I'm open for all of that, but if it's a female that we already know it needs to be someone we both really like.   I did give my wife's phone number to the female that contacted me and my wife offered to meet her for drinks, so maybe they'll get along well enough to broach the subject.   As far as adultfriendfinder goes, I just hope we don't run across a bunch of flaky females like we did the last time.   I also hope some of the couples we used to play with that wrote us off don't try to contact us either.   Don't know if we'll have too much luck at the meet and greets, as most of the women we run into aren't our type.   Perhaps we'll go buy another membership at the swingers club and start visiting more often.  At this point, it's exciting to see that she's willing to do whatever it takes to find our unicorn.

Ahhhh, the thrill of the hunt.

Don't Tell Women EVERYTHING

So today I get an email from one of our former swinger friends.    Haven't heard from her in almost two years.  She and her husband came to the very first swingers party we ever hosted.   Funny thing is that we never got to have sex or even kiss one another.   I remember we were sitting on the couch at our party talking, and she told me to go upstairs and get a condom.   I got the condom and came back downstairs.   I was sitting on the couch with the condom on my erection, then she and a few other people walked outside for a smoke.   So she left me just sitting on the couch with a condom on my hard dick...LOL.   Funny times. She and her husband ended up moving to a different state a few months later.

So she hit me up out of the blue today asking how the two of us were doing.  She also said she left her husband and moved back to the state, but lives about two hours away.  I sent a reply and said it was good to hear from her, and asked how she's doing.

So as I'm replying to the email, I'm thinking if I should even tell my wife I got the email.   I think about it for a few minutes, and figure that the best thing to do would be to tell my wife so I don't feel like I'm hiding anything.  I text my wife about the email, and forwarded the email along with my reply.

Of course her reply is:  Hmmm, interesting that she still has your email.        Every dude out there reading this already knows what kind of "talk" we're going to have when we both get home from work.   Soon as I read her reply email I knew it was a mistake to tell her about the email.   Women always say they want you to be honest and upfront with them, and THIS is why it's usually not worth the hassle.   Shit, SHE is the one who cheated while we were swinging, not me.  We don't swing anymore, but we both have said we still like to have swinger/open-minded friends because we'd love to do a group trip to a clothing-optional resort one day.

Sometimes it's just better to keep your mouth shut......lesson learned.

 

The End of Swinging: Unicorn Search

So awhile ago I asked my wife for one last threesome, and then also one last party so we can end our swinging on a positive note.

She thought about it for a few days, and she told me that she doesn't think she can do another party/orgy.     She feels like it would open the doors to her wanting other men again, and given everything that happened she doesn't want to take that chance.    I can completely understand where she's coming from, because it would almost be like asking a former alcoholic to go to a bar.

She said she was also struggling with the idea of letting me have intercourse with another woman.   Oral sex and everything else she is okay with, she just didn't know if she would be comfortable with me being inside another woman.   She thought more about it and she agreed that we could have one last threesome, but she wasn't sure if she wanted it to be a woman she really trusts or a complete stranger that we would never see again.

I told her that we would not just take the first woman that comes along.   Since it's going to be the last time, I want it to be a really sexy woman that we are both attracted to.   So then my wife decided that it would probably be best if it was a stranger.   So I guess it's time we start hitting up the swinger clubs again in search of a unicorn.   I just hope my wife doesn't do like the last time and actually puts forth some effort to find another woman.   *Crossing fingers*

Mak Nuk Village Review (Clothing Optional)

The wife and I are always interested in checking out new clothing-optional/swinger resorts.   In my opinion, there's nothing like being able to walk around naked and everyone else is naked too.   It also means a lot less hassle when trying to pack your luggage.   Also, we don't want to hear other people's screaming kids when we're on vacation so nude resorts are great for that.   We hadn't had a true vacation in two years, so this summer we checked out Mak Nuk Village in Tulum, Mexico.

It's a small but beautiful resort.   Being pretty new, all of the rooms are in excellent condition.   This isn't your typical hotel room, as the rooms are actually condos that have owners but are rented out.   We stayed in a 1 bedroom condo that had a full kitchen, living room, and a full sized refrigerator.   The condo we stayed in seemed like it was about 1000 sq ft in size.    The floors were nicely tiled (Travertine I think) and we stayed in a swim-up suite.    There were gigantic sliding glass doors leading out to the pool.   Pro Tip:  If you're staying for more than 3 days, pay the extra and go with the 1 bedroom condo, not the studio suite.     

As nice as the rooms were, I really...REALLY want to give this place 5 stars...but I just can't.   Granted the rooms are 5 star, I'll give them that.   You'll fly into Cancun, and it's about an hour and a half drive to the Tulum area of Mexico.    When we booked our reservation with the resort, we also paid extra for round trip transportation to and from the resort.     Pro Tip:   If you've never flown into Cancun before, when exiting the airport ignore EVERYONE who is offering you transportation.   They are ALL timeshare people trying to suck you in.   They will lie and tell you anything to get you to stop by your booth.    The first one who approached us asked what transportation company we were using.  We told them, and they directed us to a particular guy.   Of course as soon as he pulled out a map I knew he was trying to bullshit us, and we walked away.   Another "official" looking person approached us and pointed to a particular guy, and said this was the guy from our transportation company.   Again another attempt at a timeshare.   If you've booked private transportation, the guy will be waiting for OUTSIDE the airport and will have a sign with your name on it.

When we arrived, there were only two other couples staying there, and one of the couples left the next morning.    So for three days there was only one other couple there, and then for our last three days we literally were the only couple there.   It made for a relaxing time, but to be honest some days we got a little bored and wished there were people to talk to.  So if you're looking for a fun week, I would suggest going on a week where there is a lifestyle takeover or a special event.  You may also want to book a 1/2 day tour (we went snorkeling in a cenote, also went to the Mayan ruins)    Also because of this, there was no free shuttle to take us to their nude beach.    

One complaint is the beach owned by the resort is like 40 minutes away, and they said there is literally nothing there at that beach so we'd have to bring our own drinks and food.   Also since no one was hardly there at the resort, there was no cook or anything so we had to fend for ourselves for meals.  You can buy a weeks worth of food at the supermarket for about $100.  Our room was only $160 a night, so I won't complain about this much.  One of the days we took a taxi to a different resort so we could use their beach.  Most resorts will charge you $10 a chair if you are not a guest, but they will serve you drinks and food.  Usually with most of them if you order food and a few drinks they won't bother you about paying for the chairs. 

One knock on the resort is that it's on a dark, isolated street.   You'll have to walk a few blocks before you finally get on the main road where there are places to eat, and vendors.    Just make sure you plan accordingly so you aren't walking back down that road in the pitch dark.   I'm a guy who can handle myself in a fight, but I was nervous walking back to the resort with my wife because it's so dark, and thick bushes and trees are on each side of the street.   I would honestly suggest renting a car because of this, and also the supermarket is about a 30 minute walk.  Otherwise you'll want to get the manager to call a taxi for you.

Another knock on the resort is they have no cable or satellite TV.   They do have free WiFi and they have Apple TV.    Apple TV doesn't do any good though unless you already have a subscription to Netflix, Hulu, etc.    Granted if there had been more people at the resort to interact with, we probably wouldn't have been in the room that much.    I ended up doing a free month trial of Netflix just so we'd have something to watch.  Also the tap water is not drinkable, so it can be a little bit of a hassle to brush your teeth.    The water and ice from the fridge come from bottled water, so that's safe.

I hate to say it, but the resort had an ant problem as well.     The other couple told us there were a lot of ants in their room when they checked in, and they made the maintenance staff spray for ants.   We didn't see any when we checked in so we didn't really think about it.   Then one evening we left a plate of cookies on the kitchen counter and left for a few hours to go shopping for souvenirs.   When we came back, there were tons of ants everywhere, and there was a long line of ants coming in from the next room.   Took us a while to clear out all the ants and we had to leave our garbage can outside because they were in there as well.   Pro Tip:    Put down a line of dish soap when you see where the ants are coming from.   The ants won't cross that line.

Overall, I'm going to give this resort 3.5 stars.   We're willing to give this resort another try since new resorts often have little problems to work out that will be gone by the next time you visit.   I would suggest giving the resort a try because we've heard through the grapevine that they will be increasing their prices soon.   I would also be willing in a few years the area they are in won't be so isolated anymore as other companies will start building there as well.   Tulum itself is a great place to visit because most of the tourists are in Cancun and Playa Del Carmen so it's less busy and more laid back.    

     

Swing Wars Episode IV: A New Hope

So as some of you know, I'm a big advocate of the book "No More Mr Nice Guy".   If you're a guy who's been "too nice" to women all your life, go buy the book NOW.  Like a typical nice guy, we're often afraid of rocking the boat in a relationship by asking for what we want.   We're the kind of guys who focus on trying to make our women and others happy, often at the expense of our own happiness.   Thankfully I am learning to no longer be like this.

I was supposed to get a threesome for my birthday, but that fell through.   I also found out that my wife and our friend had agreed that we could do everything EXCEPT for intercourse.   I don't know about you, but in my mind I don't feel that's a TRUE threesome.

So this past weekend, I told my wife how I felt about everything.   I was nervous while doing it, but I felt that I needed to express my desires to her.  I told her that I want a TRUE threesome, and an orgy to finish our swinging with a bang.    In my earlier blogs I've talked extensively about the events that led up to us no longer swinging, and to be honest I don't like the way it all ended.    I want things to end on a more positive note with good memories instead of frustration and anger.  I knew my wife might get angry or upset over me asking for this, but I figured what the hell.   A closed mouth doesn't get fed, and you'll never get what you want in life if you don't ask or go after it.  

My wife asked me "So if you get the threesome and we have another party/orgy, will you then be satisfied?".
Honestly I hadn't given it a whole lot of thought because I expected her to say no.   I had to think about it for a day or two.   I remembered how I would always be frustrated after we would host a swingers party, because things would never go as planned.  My wife would either forget about me while she was off with other men, or there wouldn't be enough available women, etc.   I didn't know if I wanted to go through that same frustration again, especially if I wanted to end the lifestyle on a positive note.

I thought about it long and hard.   I also remembered how frustrating it was to try and find a single female for our one and only threesome.   Did I really want to go through that again.   After thinking about it, I told my wife that yes, yes I would be completely done with swinging if I was able to get a threesome and then later plan our last swingers party.   I figure that this time, I will not be in such a rush to find a woman for our threesome.   I'll take my time and pick a really awesome female that my wife and I are both attracted.   So it may take up to 2 years to find that right woman, but that's okay.    Also if we throw another party, we will be extremely selective about who we invite so that BOTH of us have a good time.   I figure if this is going to be our last hurrah, we better make it worth our time.

Surprisingly, my wife was actually receptive to the idea, but she said she wanted some time to think about it before giving me an answer.   Wish me luck guys!